'The Lesser Known "I Don't Have a Dream" Speech'
What do you do when you don't have a dream? That is my dilemna. Yes, I went to school for Fashion Design because I thought that was my dream. Turns out, it isn't. Fashion can be exciting and beautiful and I do love it, but not in the way that I thought. I love Fashion for the way that it beautifies the world, makes people feel good in their skin and gives us something new to look forward to every season. But fashion is too demanding, too superficial, too unimportant. If I'm going to spend my life doing something, I want it to be something that helps people. And although I do think that looking good and having a sense of fashion is important, it isn't usually life-changing. I want to make a difference.
But how? I don't know what to do. I do NOT want to go back to school to learn something else, that would be a waste of 4 years and roughly $100,000. So I want to find something that uses my degree and my knowledge but also helps, enlightens, changes, grows or moves! Can fashion do that?
And worse yet, everytime I am dumb enough to open my mouth about an idea or thought I have about something I might like to do, a week later I change my mind. So what should I do? Should I just wander around my life as if I am a stranger in it? I need to find a dream- something to work for- something meaningful. How will I find it when I'm not even sure what I'm looking for?
But how? I don't know what to do. I do NOT want to go back to school to learn something else, that would be a waste of 4 years and roughly $100,000. So I want to find something that uses my degree and my knowledge but also helps, enlightens, changes, grows or moves! Can fashion do that?
And worse yet, everytime I am dumb enough to open my mouth about an idea or thought I have about something I might like to do, a week later I change my mind. So what should I do? Should I just wander around my life as if I am a stranger in it? I need to find a dream- something to work for- something meaningful. How will I find it when I'm not even sure what I'm looking for?
posted by Rach @ 10:55 p.m.
2 Comments:
At 9:33 p.m. ,
Mandi said...
oh pookie, i am so sorry u feel so lost. i definitely understand. i wish i could give u an answer and tell u that "u should do this!..." but, i cant. i think u'll figure it out. it just takes time and prayer and a lot of thinking. but also, it takes trying things. dont think about how u dont want to work in a boring job for years...instead think about it as a chance to just try something new. something that could give you more experience and in the end it could lead to something you really enjoy. this is the time to try lots of different jobs in order to learn more about yourself and other people. think of this searching time as a time to just do anything!! and dont think of your schooling as a waste. it wasnt. all that will come in handy one day and u will use those skills eventually. sorry this is so long. i got rambling. we havent talked in a while :) love u lots.
~mandi
At 11:34 p.m. ,
Alyssa Joy Lewis said...
Hello! I just came to your blog after reading your comment on Heather's blog about posting right after me. lol And I thought, maybe you could be Alyssa. And I could be you. For like a day. Maybe that would be fun. Except I don't really know you. I think your name is Rachel. That's cool that you went to school for fashion. Especially as a Christian. It must be weird competing with the world's ideas of fashion and trying to balance them with your own moral standards. I get so frustrated with my body-type sometimes. I'm tall and thin, and everything seems to be made to fit really curvy women. Or I'll find something I like and feel comfy in, but it'll be too revealing for me to get, which always makes me sad. That's happened too many times. It's like, can they just add a little more material there? Or, Can't they have the small chest/buttocks version of this? And larger women have the opposite problem, I imagine. It makes me wonder how many women actually fit into the streotypically-sized clothing.
Anyways, great post. It's tough to find validity in being an artist in God's kingdom. I hope you are doing well.
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